Kelsey, did you know?

I love this time of year.  I have started up the Christmas music and it just puts a smile on my face.  While traveling home from ABQ the last time a beautiful song came on by Amy Grant - Breath of Heaven

Do you wonder as you watch my face

If a wiser one should have had my place?

But I offer all I am

For the mercy of Your plan

Help me be strong, help me be, help me

Breath of Heaven, hold me together

Be forever near me, Breath of Heaven

Breath of Heaven, lighten my darkness

Pour over me Your holiness for You are holy

I began to think about Mary holding baby Jesus, looking down at him and all that he would become.  Growing up, Whitney and I sang the song Mary Did you Know and it still brings tears to my eyes today.  I thought about how she must have felt kissing that little baby, knowing what he would go through as he got older.  You know, we think about Jesus as a baby at Christmas and as a man at Easter on the cross, but can you picture that little baby hanging on the cross for all of our ugly sins?  I can't imagine how that would feel as a parent. 

We always want to be able to protect our kids from pain, suffering, ridicule and everything else the world can dish out.  Mary held her little baby and knew there was nothing she could do to protect him from what was to come.  I started to think about why God chose Mary and why he chose me to be the mother to Madelynn and Annika.  Was there something extra special about her?  Did she have some special connection with God?  Why was she the chosen one?  Why was I chosen to have this extra special child.  I hear those words by Amy Grant, "Do you wonder, as you watch my face, if a wiser one should have had my place?"

I think that no matter how our children are abled, we have moments in raising them that we think, "Are you sure I am the right one for this job, God?"  Well, just as I was thinking about all of this guess what the sermon was about on Sunday....Yup, Miss Mary herself.  

As I sat there and listened to Pastor Monty talk about Mary receiving the news and listening to the angel I realized that what was special about Mary was her obedience to God.  Did she have a few doubts about the information she was receiving, heck yeah!  But, did she let that hold her back from the amazing things God had in store for her, NO!  Her response,

 "I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled.” Then the angel left her." Luke 1:38

Mary didn't posses any powers, she wasn't part angel, she was just like you and me, but she was willing and ready for whatever God had in store for her.  Once she got over her bit of doubt she was ready to go.  I am not sure I can always say that.  If God sent an angel to me right now and told me what he wanted me to do would I be that obedient?  Do I have a heart that is tuned to God, spending time with him everyday, getting to know his voice so that when he calls I would recognize it and be ready?  

When I look down at Annika and kiss her face, I can't even imagine what God has in store for her.  I can't see all the ways he is going to use her little life to show his face to those around us.  When I hold her in my arms I wonder why God chose me, but I know I am his servant and ready for whatever he has planned for our lives.  So, I pray that my obedience will allow God to use me however he sees fit, and I know that through this I will experience the glory of God first hand and in ways I can't even imagine.